I Wish You Well

Ok. Its been awhile since I've seen you last.
It hasn't been the same. I feel odd, not used to certain things anymore.
Clearly you def not mine but i feel like a small part of you is.

But hey you know what they say. All good things do come to an end. But do know
that in my mind where thoughts come together to form one word, one wish, one feeling, one act. I can only wait. Wait the day where I can be in your shoes. To have what you have, and share what you share w/you.

i MISS it truly...Whatever happened its jye wired. and all i can say is "I WISH YOU WELL"

Not Like Crazy!

Man its funny how life is. Talking to this guy one day opened my eyes up to something.
He told me that he was in a situation and that he needed my help/advice. He said is this girl he knows that got him feeling a crazy way. She's one of the greatest untouchable women he has ever met. It't the perfect Bitter/Sweet for him. I said wow are you serious,,,you mean to tell me you want her but she's untouchable. I then said to him. that's tough. Then he said to me the only way I get through this crazy feeling is by faking myself out. Making myself believe she's is mine. But not entirely because she treats me like im one of her's and she sooo caring, and everytime she does something that shows she cares, she makes me get this feeling. . I said to him your Crazy....and then tells me No Im not I like this crazy feeling and im content with it until my dream becomes reality in a sense. I said Hey must be a good feeling for you. He looks at me then smiles and said listen to "Not Like Crazy"

When we first met
I was surprised to get
That feeling,
That feeling
The kind that don't wash away with soap
So sweet to me,
Oohh
The kind of feeling I need
To get me through the darkest days
For you I prayed

What you do is crazy babe
Not like you belong in an asylum
Crazy babe,
Like the sun in the morning
And the moon at night
Like the rain falling from the sky
Like the trees growing from the ground
I'm astounded babe
By your love for me
And your touching me
And your trust in me
Like you do whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo

Even now I still feel that feeling
Although we've grown
We're still on the same side
Of the proverbial road
Heading in the same direction
I'm so glad to know
With you I spend my time (In my dream that is)..........

Something!........

Damn. I think I was falling too fast and clearly rules didn't apply. I can't believe i just met you.
You had me here watching min. pass by wondering when Imma see you, expect you, chill with you. But something said slow down partna You need time. But shit I couldn't take it...and here comes the big "BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM"
There you go again.....WTF is this a dream or something cuz your looking like every pix I've ever dreamed of Her in my dream...You look exactly like my dream girl Inside and out.HHHHOOOOLLLLDDDD UP.
I've seen it all b4 but never figured out the end cuz finally I would wake up and realized i should of know better then to think this is real when you can't be mine

All I could draw from this is that maybe this could be something. or maybe it's just nothing @ all.

I don't mean falling in Love but strong feelings. Love takes time. and time was something I was creating. maybe for an alternative motive that would end in GOOD or maybe not...

Guess life is what we make of it.

Letter to the Unknown.

Dear You aka The Unknown.

Lately you have been causing me to think heavy. You have been causing me to think of the possibility of what i can not have. Hmmm Why? Thats irrelevant. Everyday in life someone gain's, someone maintains, and of course someone loses. I never lose. I have come to the conclusion that from my last blog, I really have to chill and take things as they are, instead of trying to force what can't be. What is that you may say. It's You aka The Unknown. I have to now deal with reality and come back down to earth and maintain until The Unknow give's a sign. If one never comes then @ least I won't lose the Unknown because it never happened. Well The ball is in your court You aka The Unknown. ....

To be Continued......................

Whats @ Heart of a Man

While sitting at home playing PS2. (old i know) I was thinking as usual. I thought If a man is @ heart has he found love. Personally I disagree. I find this to be a catch 22 tho. I believe that if a man is @ heart that doesn't necessarily mean they have found love. They could have found a comfort zone for the mean time, they could have found someone they can connect to on all ends of the spectrum via (Sexually, Mentally, Spiritually, Emotionally & more.)

Not understanding. OK OK OK OK OK. lets do this. I'm going to use me as an example.

OK I like this Girl. She got a man. But because I connect with her on different levels and we understand our relationship. That don't mean I love her just because my heart is in that relationship (friendship kind), its just means I care and Love as a "FRIEND". Would I love to be her man? Yes!. But this topic can go in many different ways. Because the flip side of the catch 22 is this. Your feelings/connections can out grow me and it will then become LOVE. Like that do anything in the world type love, like that I'd die for you type love, like that I'll starve for you type love. Ya kno. But that can be controlled as long as you know who you are and who you are dealing with. And more importantly whats @ heart of a man?

More to come soon.

In my Heart of Hearts No One is Faithful

My daddy made no excuse or mistakes in my life in making me or should I say God didn't. I believe my lies are truth, Why wont you eat what you are fed I wonder...That I can't answer right now. When I touch myself I think of only you And when I touch someone else I realize No one is faithful For I am weak. For when I go astray just Forgive me for my ways. For we live in a wicked world.

I hear the voices Saying that i need time to myself but it Difficult when you cant stand to be alone Cause the emptiness is all I have ever known and it's hardto stay this way forever, for forever can come in a day which will make you completely blinded. But Soiled by my lust I feel no shame and No longer forsaken when they call my name for Beautiful angels come to my bed to comfort me and instantly I am satisfied on their flesh I have fed

So I say to you again. No one is faithful in this wicked world. I am weak and
I go astray but just Forgive me for my ways.

Is it In you?

I ask the question. Is it in You? I feel that losing and Failing is not an option in my book. Even though I have lost and will continue to lose @ some point in my life. I don't condition my mind to allow me to believe that I've lost. But, when I lose I still Win. Ironic or stupid?....NO! I feel that When I lose. I learn a weakness that will make me stronger in the End. It will show me where I need to improve, where i've failed myself. For example. I'm playing a video game against a friend, I lose, but In me losing I see where I need to improve in order to win. Simple. So Im always @ a Win-Win

Plans don't Fail, Man just Fails to Make Plans

You don't have a plan by saying I'm going to graduate college and be a doctor. that's not enough if you believe several years of school and a few of residencies will hit the "goal", you have defeated yourself. A goal is its path, In order to plan effectively you must find the honest answers to the following questions. Why am I the person that I am? What contributes to my taste in clothes, music, movies, women/men, cars, ect....? If you lie to yourself your answers may suggest that your likes and dislikes are birthed from within. However if your honest you will realize it's all outwardly. We are who we are because of the things we are not. Ex. Your young, middle class, street smart, only because your not old, upper or lower class, or Harvard groomed(rough example but the point is within it). Discover the experience that will make you what you are not and get it. If you want to graduate college and become a doctor, dont be foolish and believe your goal is the destination. Every action and thought that originates with you determines the outcome of your path. you must be in control of your actions and thoughts at all times. your current activities and thoughts are the wrong ones for what you desire; they are the activities and thoughts of some who has what you have.

2 Be or Not 2 Be...NO!...WHY is the (?)

Sitting on a bench in a town center on a beautiful sunny day waiting on my little sister. I see a few things going on. A lady and her two teenage sons. walking, having a good time, then i see a group of dudes (friends) laughing, chilling, looking for some bait (women). Then I see this beautiful girl walking with such a dejected look on her face. A few sec. later her man/BF walks behind her saying all kinds of pessimistic things about her in PUBLIC. and the only thing she could say was "why do you treat me this way. I said i was sorry. "

Now. at this very moment a few things are going on. 1. she is getting disrespected as a lady, 2. she is accepting everything she is hearing and not standing up for herself, like she should at least. 3. others are looking at the couple's embarrassing behavior. taking notes.

The fact of the matter is "WHY DO WOMEN PUT UP WITH ANYTHING FROM A DUDE, JUST TO SAY I HAVE A MAN."

But its funny because they would be the first to down talk a dude. Well obviously you was acting, appearing a certain way to attract the dude you so call call a DOG.
Sum1 please help me understand this.

A Word + A Word= A Phrase, A Phrase ^50 = Feelings

"When Your Spirit becomes Strained And Your Limited to Change, The Lyrics In Your Limericks will Change. With A Different Hook The Way Your Sentences Arranged and it becomes More Demented In Your Deliverance and More Sinister In Your Slang, which can cause it to Sounds More Belligerent When Its Sang"........................................................................................... Now Just Think about that. and Ill feed you the rest of what Me Posting this has to do with Me.............

My Drive for Drivers

I don't know what it is about these types of shoes that a dude luv but hey maybe one day ill figure it out. I guess it's because you can wear them with most things such as shorts and a nice button down (def: of Class), or even some linen pants wit a polo (def: of sporty)...oh well Gucci, Prada, Ferragamo, Zara, and Hugo keep making them cuz ill keep supporting.

The lady that Made it Happen 4 Me

OK, so today Is my mothers Birthday. HHHMMM what to do what to do? Should i make this whole week dedicated to her? Maybe!.... Man!..IDK.. Well i kno one thing I love her to death and if it wasn't for her IDK where i would be. She has been a major part of my life and im grateful for all that she has done. Theres not enough words to express how much this woman means to me. We've had our ups and downs dont get me wrong but that's what makes relationships stronger. <3>